


I Never Meant For This To Happen

by ghostlyfraggle



Category: Asagao Academy: Normal Boots Club
Genre: First Crush, First Kiss, Gay Panic, M/M, i didnt mean for this to be so long i got carried away ok, its fine, oh where do i start, thats enough tags, title is in reference to me, typical highschool romance cliches, you know what - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-08
Updated: 2016-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-13 22:52:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7989085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostlyfraggle/pseuds/ghostlyfraggle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Jimmy has a crush on Shane, and goes to Ian for help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Never Meant For This To Happen

_ Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. _

 

_ Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. _

 

This clock was driving Jimmy  _ fucking insane _ . It didn't even make the right noises. It only ticked, never tocked like normal clocks did. He tapped his pencil eraser against his middle-row desk, to the same rhythm as the clock's second hand, ignoring whatever the teacher was talking about. He really didn't care. High school was bullshit, and he had better things he could be doing, anyway. Like napping. Or petting a dog.

 

_ Why  _ did he have to be a first year when all his friends were older than him? Class was at least five times more boring when you didn't know anyone. There was no one to exchange silly faces with, no one to shoot rubber bands at, and no one to defend your unfathomably stupid arguments against the teacher. Instead, Jimmy had to resort to texting shitposts to Wallid during class, and hope to whatever entity was up in space looking out for him that he didn't get caught.

 

_ Tap. Tap. Tap. _ Jimmy continued tapping his eraser on the desk, eyeing the fire alarm on the wall, part of him wanting to pull it so  _ something  _ interesting would happen that day. But no, he couldn't do that. He'd get yelled at. By the teacher, and probably also by his friends, who wouldn't appreciate the unnecessary physical activity.

 

_ Finally _ , the bell rang. He dashed out of the classroom with all the vigor of a stereotypically Mexican mouse and towards Poppy hall, ignoring the squeaky protests of his fellow first years. Ian would be leaving class right about now, or, if he wasn't, he'd be talking to Luke about something in the classroom. Either way, easy to find.

 

Through the boringness of that day's classes, Jimmy had kind of burned himself out. He'd woken up that morning, and his brain wouldn't bother shutting the fuck up. About what? Anything. The way Wallid styled his hair in the mirror before he left for class. The patterns on the floor of the dorm hallways. The weird mark on the wall just above his locker. And, most of all, he just  _ couldn't stop thinking  _ about that moment right before class when Shane brushed past him in the hallway, and their shoulders touched for a split second, and Jimmy could swear, that in that split second, the whole world just stopped rotating.

 

And he thought about it. And thought about it some more. And came to the conclusion that Shane Gill, in all his stupid, grumpy-old-war-veteran glory, was one attractive piece of shit.

 

Which was weird, because Jimmy hadn't really thought that about way another guy before.

 

And then there was Ian, Asagao's residential Gay™ and also one of Jimmy's friends. He was obviously the one to ask about this.

 

"Ian!" Jimmy exclaimed, almost tripping on his own feet as he skidded to a stop outside Miss Shizuka's classroom. Ian stopped, letting students walk around him, and turned around to look at the first year. "I have a problem."

 

"Something wrong?" Ian asked, raising his eyebrows. Jimmy leaned over on his knees, catching his breath.

 

"Yeah, I mean, kind of," he said. "Can we go somewhere quieter? Preferably where no one can hear us?"

 

"'Course," Ian said, beginning to walk away. Jimmy followed him. They walked down the hall, out of the building, and towards the field.

 

Jimmy should've guessed. They were headed to that  _ one  _ tree, the one that Ian was  _ always  _ at. Jimmy wasn't sure what about it was so special, but it seemed secluded enough for this conversation.

 

Ian sat, his back against the tree's trunk. Jimmy settled down next to him.

 

Ian exhaled loudly before speaking. "Lay it on me. What's bothering you?"

 

"So..." Jimmy began, before realizing that he didn't exactly know what he was going to say. Was he just going to outright state  _ Ian, I think I like boys _ ? No, of course not. There was no way he'd be able to get a sentence like that past his tonsils. So, what the hell was he going to say, then?

 

A moment of thinking later, he managed to push some words out of his mouth. "I was like, thinking a lot in class today, because school is fucking boring, and I think I realized something and I'm...I dunno. Confused? Scared? A little worried?"

 

"Okay," Ian dragged out the vowels in the word. "Elaborate. What did you realize?"

 

"Fuck, I..." Jimmy began, rubbing his face with his hands nervously. "...I mean, obviously, I have eyes and a brain, so like I know when someone's good looking, but I've never really found any boys... _ attractive _ before. Like, personally. And I've never found girls attractive  _ either _ , but I figured it was just because I hadn't found the right one yet or something and..."

 

"Hey," Ian interrupted him, the smallest of smiles playing on his lips. "Calm down. Breathe."

 

Jimmy looked at him, mildly surprised. "Thanks," he said, pausing for a moment to breathe as Ian had suggested. "Basically I'm trying to say that I think maybe I'm... _ not  _ straight."

 

"And that's okay," Ian said. "You don't have to label yourself, if you don't want. Hell knows I didn't know what to call myself when I first realized I was gay. Take your time to figure yourself out."

 

Jimmy hesitated for a moment before running a hand through his hair and biting his lip anxiously. "Thanks. Really."

 

...

 

At lunch the next day, Jimmy found himself constantly glancing towards the Normal Boots table. Ian told him to take his time figuring himself out, but he was impatient. He wanted to know  _ now _ . And obviously, staring at Shane until he learned something was the best method.

 

Unfortunately, he wasn't particularly good at being discreet.

 

"Something interesting at the Normal Boots table?" Luke asked, a laugh rumbling out of his chest. Instantly, Jimmy looked away, his cheeks aflame.

 

"No," Jimmy replied. Ian raised his eyebrows, but didn't say anything.

 

Jimmy was immensely thankful. The  _ last  _ thing he needed right now was for someone to overhear and start spreading rumors. He'd dealt with that enough in middle school.

 

His friends went back to their previous conversation, and Jimmy let it fade into the background noise. A moment later, his eyes had wandered back to Shane, who was laughing at something someone else at the table had said. Seeing him  _ smile _ was rare, let alone laugh, and Jimmy felt like he was witnessing the second coming of the actual fucking Jesus Christ himself.

 

And,  _ god _ , his  _ face _ ...and his hair, Jimmy just wanted to thread his fingers through it...and his tie was a little bit crooked, and it was giving Jimmy less-than-decent thoughts.

 

Goddammit. That was really gay, wasn't it?

 

He wondered if Shane was just  _ really  _ attractive, or if Jimmy was one of the only people who saw him in that way.

 

It was probably the latter.  _ Jared  _ was the one known for making people question their sexualities, not Shane.

 

But, damn. Just,  _ damn _ .

 

Suddenly, his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out, holding it slightly under the table, and saw that he'd received a text from Ian.

 

**Ianime**

Ok, romeo, who is it?

 

Jimmy looked up and shot an angry glance across the table at Ian, to which the response was simply a lopsided smirk.

 

Great.

 

He rapidly typed a reply.

 

**Jommy**

why the fcuk shoudlj i telll you

 

**Ianime**

Enlighten me, how exactly do you pronounce "shoudlj"?

 

**Jommy**

id pronounce it something along the lines of "go fuck yourself"

 

**Ianime**

Haha. funny.

 

**Ianime**

Anyway, you should tell me because I'm your friend, and MAYBE, just maybe, I can assist you in your romantic endeavors.

 

**Jommy**

ok but what if this guy is 1. probably straight 2. probably not over his ex girlfriend

 

**Ianime**

Oh, so it's Shane.

 

**Jommy**

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCJLKHHGFRDSRERYTU

 

**Ianime**

:)

 

**Jommy**

DONT ":)" ME YOU PIZZA SHIT

 

**Ianime**

Calm down. I'm not gonna tell anyone, I promise.

 

**Ianime**

But, just between you and me, he's not a bad choice for a first crush.

 

**Jommy**

iiiiiaaaaaaaaannnnnnn what do i doooooooooo

 

**Ianime**

Normally in this type of situation I'd recommend you just go talk to him.

 

**Ianime**

But this is Shane we're talking about.

 

**Ianime**

So...uh...I'm not sure.

 

**Jommy**

thanks for the help :^)

 

**Ianime**

You could ask Jon or Jirard for advice, maybe

 

**Ianime**

They're pretty good friends with him.

 

**Jommy**

ok thanks for real this time

 

**Jommy**

but you really, REALLY promise you won't tell anyone, right? not a word?

 

**Ianime**

Of course.

 

...

 

Hours later, Jimmy stood in front of the door to Jon's dorm, rocking on his heels anxiously and stalling before he knocked. He'd realized halfway there that asking for advice regarding Shane would likely give light to his...situation. And he wasn't sure he was ready for that.

 

He could hear voices inside, rapidly approaching the door.  _ It's either knock now or get caught, Jim-Jam _ , he thought.

 

So he raised his hand and rapped his knuckles on the door.

 

The door opened almost immediately, and both PBG and Jon stood on the other side.

 

"Hey, Jimmy," Jon said. "We were about to head out, did you need something?"

 

"O-oh, uh," Jimmy said, shifting nervously, the floorboards creaking underneath him. "Yeah, uh, no, didn't need anything. It's fine, you can go."

 

He laughed nervously. Neither PBG nor Jon looked particularly convinced.

 

"Are you sure, man?" Jon asked. "You seem kinda anxious."

 

"Yeah, it's c-cool," Jimmy said. He hadn't meant to stutter. He hoped Jon and PBG wouldn't notice. "I'll just go ask someone else, don't worry about it."

 

"Yeah, I dunno about him, but I'm worrying about it," PBG frowned. "I'm sure the club won't mind waiting a few minutes."

 

Jimmy exhaled loudly. Great.

 

"Yeah, they won't mind," Jon said, gesturing for Jimmy to come inside the room. "What's up?"

 

Jimmy stepped inside the dorm, feeling rather small (literally and figuratively). PBG and Jon stared at him expectantly.

 

"So, this is probably a stupid question..." Jimmy began, staring at Jon's shoes and wringing his hands together. "...but, like, if I wanted to talk to Shane, how would I go about doing that? And by 'talk to' I mean 'actually hold a fairly engaging conversation with'."

 

"Is that all?" PBG furrowed his eyebrows, in that way he always did when he stared at Hana from across the room.

 

"Were you expecting fucking groundbreaking news?" Jimmy said, snapping his head up. "Yeah, that's all. I want to talk to Shane, and he's  _ impossible  _ to approach. Could I get some assistance here?"

 

"I mean, sure," Jon said. "I'd say just  _ go  _ for it, dude. That's the thing about Shane, he  _ looks  _ hard to approach but in reality he's just shy as hell."

 

"He is?" Jimmy questioned, tilting his head slightly.

 

Jon waved his hand dismissively. " _ Hell  _ yes. Just don't bring up his ex and you should be fine."

 

"Wow, okay," Jimmy said, in slight disbelief. "Thanks."

 

...

 

Late that night, Jimmy received another text from Ian.

 

**Ianime**

Ok, don't come to my dorm and murder me, but I made a mistake

 

**Jommy**

im already grabbing my katana off the wall that i totally have

 

**Ianime**

I kind of sort of maybe let something slip to Jeff.

 

**Jommy**

..........ian

 

**Ianime**

Ok, ok, you're mad, I get it

 

**Ianime**

But we're roommates and he asked about it and I said I couldn't tell him, but then he asked if you maybe had a crush on someone at the normal boots table, and what was I supposed to say?

 

**Ianime**

At first he thought Hana or Mai. I tried to keep my mouth shut ok

 

**Ianime**

He doesn't know it's Shane, at least? He knows it's one of the guys, though. I'm sorry dude really

 

**Jommy**

im going to fucking strangle you

 

**Ianime**

Ok, sure

 

**Jommy**

no really i am putting on my jacket right now and i am going to go to your room and fucking strangle you. ill wear gloves too so the police cant identify me and they wont take jeffs word because ill frame him so he goes to jail and cant spread rumors about how gay i totally am

 

**Ianime**

I know for a fact you're still in bed. Likely wrapped up in a blanket burrito.

 

**Jommy**

>:(

 

**Jommy**

youre right but that doesnt make it ok

 

**Ianime**

I know

 

**Ianime**

I know and I'm sorry, really

 

**Ianime**

But you can trust Jeff. He won't spread rumors. And if he does, I'll, uh...

 

**Jommy**

fucking murder him please

 

**Ianime**

...sure. I'll fucking murder him.

 

**Jommy**

thanks for telling me i guess

 

**Ianime**

Thanks for understanding.

 

**Jommy**

im gonna talk to shane tomorrow

 

**Jommy**

wish me luck

 

**Ianime**

Good luck, dude.

 

...

 

Early the next morning, Jimmy awkwardly stumbled into Miss Shizuka's classroom, where Shane normally hid before class. He sat next to the window, the rising sun silhouetting him, and Jimmy inhaled sharply, feeling like he was looking at some kind of mythical creature or ethereal being in its natural habitat.

 

The only noises in the room were the scratching of Shane's pencil against his acid-free sketchbook paper, and Jimmy's pulse pounding in his ears. God, he hoped Shane couldn't hear that.

 

Shane either hadn't noticed him yet, or was pointedly ignoring his presence. He hoped for the former.

 

He stepped forward, the floor creaking under his shoes, and placed his hands on a desk a few feet away from the artist. "H-hi."

 

"Hey," Shane muttered, keeping his eyes focused on his drawing. His voice was kind of rough and sleepy. "Did you need something?"

 

"Uh, no," Jimmy said, trying to get a glimpse at what Shane was drawing. Unfortunately, a history textbook was blocking his otherwise perfect view. "J-just saying hi. What are you drawing?"

 

Shane cast a quick glance at Jimmy, mildly surprised. "Nothing important," he responded, and something about his tone made Jimmy think that maybe it  _ was  _ something important (or otherwise notable).

 

"Can I see?" Jimmy asked, more confidently than he'd expected. His tone of voice shocked him a bit and he straightened his posture.

 

Shane sighed. "No."

 

"Aww, why not?" Jimmy slid into the desk's chair, a smirk playing on his lips.

 

"Become an artist and dare to ask me again," Shane turned towards Jimmy, setting his pencil down.  _ Whoops _ , Jimmy thought.

 

Jimmy laughed nervously. "Okay. I don't need to see it, sorry."

 

There was an awkward pause, in which Shane went back to his drawing and Jimmy stared oddly at the back of his neck. The sun came up further, and reflected against Shane's eyes, kind of making them glow, in a way.

 

"Do you think I don't know why you're here?" Shane spoke suddenly, causing Jimmy to jump slightly.

 

"Uh..."

 

And then, Shane did the unexpected, and  _ smirked _ . "Honestly, did you think you were being subtle yesterday? Staring at me like that?"

 

Jimmy made a stupid little noise in the back of his throat, burying his face in his arms against the desk.  _ Shit goddamn fuck of course he noticed fuck fuck... _

 

"Please, though. Enlighten me," Shane said, smugly resting his cheek on one hand and twirling his pencil around in the other. "What about me is so interesting to you?"

 

Jimmy mumbled something into his arms, not bothering to look up. Shane laughed. It was musical and  _ stupidly  _ attractive and Jimmy wanted to let out the scream that had been building up in his chest for fifteen minutes now.

 

"I didn't quite catch that," Shane said.

 

Jimmy tilted his head slightly, exposing his mouth to the air. "Fuck you," he said simply.

 

Shane laughed again. Jimmy wanted to punch him.

 

"For real," Shane said, setting his pencil back on the desk. "I don't mind if you like me. It's pretty refreshing to have someone  _ normal  _ take interest in me, to be honest."

 

"Oh, am I more normal than your ex was?" Jimmy said snarkily, quickly realizing he was going down a path he shouldn't. He didn't know a lot about Emily. He knew she was Shane's ex, and he knew she got into a lot of trouble, but hey, some fucking gay first year who consistently threatened to murder his friends couldn't be too much more normal than that.

 

"Vastly," Shane said. "First of all, your hair is normal-colored. Second of all, you're not a girl, which I suppose wouldn't be considered especially normal to some people, but it's a change of pace. Third of all, you're not some kind of government secret agent."

 

"Some kind of  _ what _ ?" Jimmy lifted his head up abruptly.

 

"Government secret agent," Shane repeated, fairly monotonously. "Emily was... _ is _ ...a... _ unique _ person."

 

His tone shifted to be less playful and more serious. Jimmy decided not to pry.

 

"Okay, but, I'm not, like, weirding you out, right?" Jimmy asked. "I get it, I'm some fucking nerdy first year, and you're probably straight, and—"

 

"Whoa,  _ straight _ ?" Shane sounded mildly offended.

 

"Uh, are you not?"

 

"Jimmy, no one at this fucking school is straight."

 

"Oh," Jimmy cast his eyes downward, processing the statement for a moment.

 

"No, Jimmy, you're not weirding me out," Shane began. He stood up from his chair, and suddenly Jimmy was staring at his ankles. "I haven't considered being in a relationship since I transferred to Asagao. However, talking with you is almost making me change my mind."

 

Jimmy held his breath, feeling Shane's gaze on the back of his head.

 

"Are you going to say something, or are you going to stare at my feet until class starts and Miss Shizuka kicks you out?"

 

"I..." Jimmy began, feeling somewhat like an anime character with a comically animated sweat drop hovering over his forehead. "What? I'm like fucking  _ twelve  _ why would you—"

 

Shane extended his hand towards Jimmy. "You're a perfectly likable human being, is what you are."

 

Jimmy accepted his hand, and felt kind of awkward as Shane pulled him up. Suddenly, their faces were kind of close together, and Jimmy could feel Shane's breath on his lips, and  _ all  _ he could think about was Shane's  _ fucking  _ lips.

 

"I'm really not, but thanks for lying—"

 

Shane cut him off for what felt like the fiftieth time that morning, but instead of with words, it was with physical contact.

 

Shane's lips were pressed roughly against his. Jimmy didn't know what to do. He'd never kissed anyone. He let his eyes flutter closed, and did what he supposed counted as kissing back.

 

Shane's lips were really soft. Like, really soft. His fingers intertwined with Jimmy's. Jimmy honestly never wanted it to end.

 

Then Shane pulled away, his eyes half-lidded, and Jimmy jumped backwards, freaking the  _ fuck  _ out.

 

_ THE  _ Shane Gill just kissed him.  _ ON THE LIPS _ .  _ AND HELD HIS HAND.  _

 

"You alright there?" Shane asked, a low chuckle rumbling out of his throat. Jimmy nodded, his eyes wide, his face as red as Nario's hat.

 

...he kind of wanted to kiss Shane again.

 

"I-I'm fine, f-fine," Jimmy said, his voice mildly squeaky. "I'd...I'd better g-get to class. See you l-later?"

 

Shane sat back down at his desk. "Sure."


End file.
